ABOUT CLÉO DUBOIS

"We learn, and then we teach."

When my journey into SM play started in the 80's, there were no comprehensive courses spanning the continuum from negotiation and communication skills to techniques and scene dynamics for safe, sane and consensual BDSM play offered in the community.  I had found the link that connects my sexuality and my spirituality in the underground private clubs gay men frequented.  It was there I learned that negotiated sadomasochism is a valid path to self-discovery, intimacy and healing. I became a Domina and ritualist, inspired by  Mark Thompson, Patk Califia, and my life partner, Fakir.  Community groups such as Outcasts, Janus, Exiles, and QSM asked me to share my style with other kinksters, giving me a voice as an ethical and informed kink presenter and educator.

As I grew in understanding of the fetishes and kinky sexuality I was encountering, I decided to focus my work towards couples and founded the Academy of SM Arts in 1995.  I continue to offer consultations in my office as well as private guided play in the dungeon. In 2000, I created and produced my first docu-play video, “The Pain Game,” in an attempt to reach more individuals and couples attracted to BDSM. The response was magical. My film screened in San Francisco, Paris, New York, Amsterdam and Minneapolis as well as many alternative film festivals. I received an award from the Society of Scientific Study of Sexuality for true depiction of loving and conscious SM. Folks asked me to make another film focusing on bondage. I released "Tie Me Up" in 2002.

By that time, many informative books on the Leather Scene, including one written by my long time friend Sybil Holiday, "Consensual Sadomasochism," were out to help kinksters find their way.  I invited Sybil to collaborate with me in creating just such a comprehensive course in SM Arts and Sensual Dominance. We had a wonderful three years teaching together.

My Academy of SM Arts is now in its tenth year of offering Erotic Dominance Intensive Weekends for Women and its seventh year of offering Erotic Dominance Intensive Weekends for Men. Based on the awareness and refinement of erotic energy exchange, these intimate workshops focus on personal empowerment and play skills, while maintaining the overall theme of dominance and relationship. This year we started to welcome the Dominant students to attend with a partner or alone. Of course our talented volunteers bottom offer their time and talents to the students taking the course alone.

I am assisted in teaching by premier Domina S/M activist educator, Eve Minax, a talented and versatile D/s trainer, and Selina Raven, a rising star in the San Francisco BDSM community. Community SM educators such as JD of Two Knotty Boys are also invited. All share my enthusiasm for BDSM as a path to making your play sexier and more connected.

These days, I still present at national conferences such as Thunder In The Mountains, Kinky Kollege, the Floating World, IMsL and local venues such as the Society of Janus, SM Odyssey and Good Vibrations. I also offer with my life partner, Fakir, "Spirit + Flesh" body-based shamanic community all day workshop/rituals. A bit of an activist, I marched in the first Folsom Street Fair, travelled to Washington DC and Minneapolis for LGBT Rights and Leather Pride events, and was nominated for Woman of the Year by the Leather Journal for the Pantheon of Leather XIX in 2009.  That accolade followed one of the most thrilling 28 minute rides of a lifetime, as it was my great honor and wonderful fun to be chosen Leather Marshall for the 2008 LGBT San Francisco Parade.  

I have been invited to speak at San Francisco State University, the University of California, The Learning Annex and the Department of Psychiatry at Kaiser Permanente in San Francisco. I am honored to be a Distinguished Lecturer at the Institute of the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco and an affiliate teacher at One Taste SF.

As a columnist, I have been published in Different Loving (1993) by Gloria Brame, Bitch Goddess by Pat Califia (1997), Sex Tips and Tales from Women Who Dare by Jo-Anne Baker (2001), in On Our Backs and on-line publications such Sensous Sadie whose website features guest writers on BDSM and spirituality topics. Most recently I am featured in Reclaiming Eros by Blackburn-Wade, 2007.  Last year, I wrote a 10 part series for Gloria Brame’s 20-UP SM Project and have a chapter in Lee Harrington's, "Sacred Kink: the Spirit of Desire," on my very first ball dance and the ritual work I do now.

I share what I have learned through nearly 30 years of shameless, consensual and fulfilling erotic play and rich long-term relationships. I believe in the magic of SM and in keeping a sense of humor about it all!